My mind has been all over the place lately, thinking happy thoughts and sad thoughts and everything in between. I have fallen to the deepest pits of darkness only to find small sparks of light that seem too far out of reach for my hands. I look around and realize that there is no chance for someone like me.
Where will hopes and dreams of better days take me? I keep reaching, but it feels like that day will never come. Still, I wish there was someone....
Why did she leave me here all alone? It doesn't matter now. I'm still upset, and very much hurt. Was I not worth the truth at all? Why couldn't you tell me the real reason? I must not have been very important to you.
And soon, my other best friend will be moving away as well. I'll be here all alone. Making new friends could be the answer, but friendships take time to build.
Some days I feel like my heart is tied in painful knots and I just want to scream. I just want to yell out how frustrated I am with everything and everyone. Where is courage when I need it? Why can't I ever express what I want? Why can't I just shout "HEY I WANT YOU!"
Fear. That is why. Fear of looking stupid, fear of rejection, fear of fear.
So, is confidence important? Yes, I believe it is. I had enough courage to say the first part...but the second part is oh so fleeting. I feel like I won't have a chance in hell!
What does it matter? It's not like anyone I know reads this damn thing even though the link has been on my facebook page for MONTHS.
/end rant
Relax. Time heals all :. If you feel strong emotions about something, write a book about it. It does say you want to be an author on your profile, so go ahead :D
ReplyDeleteOh and I came to your blog because you were listed as a follower in mine.
Cheers ^^